The Secret of Happiness

by Steve Brunkhorst, © Copyright 2004

The old man shuffled slowly into the restaurant. With head tilted, and shoulders bent forward, he leaned on his trusty cane with each unhurried step.

His tattered cloth jacket, patched trousers, worn out shoes, and warm personality made him stand out from the usual Saturday morning breakfast crowd. Unforgettable were his pale blue eyes that sparkled like diamonds, large rosy cheeks, and thin lips held in a tight, steady smile.

He stopped, turned with his whole body, and winked at a little girl seated by the door. She flashed a big grin right back at him. A young waitress named Mary watched him shuffle toward a table by the window.

Mary ran over to him, and said, "Here, Sir. Let me give you a hand with that chair."

Without saying a word, he smiled and nodded a thank you. She pulled the chair away from the table. Steadying him with one arm, she helped him move in front of the chair, and get comfortably seated. Then she scooted the table up close to him, and leaned his cane against the table where he could reach it.

In a soft, clear voice he said, "Thank you, Miss. And bless you for your kind gestures."

"You're welcome, Sir." She replied. "And my name is Mary. I'll be back in a moment, and if you need anything at all in the mean time, just wave at me!"

After he had finished a hearty meal of pancakes, bacon, and hot lemon tea, Mary brought him the change from his ticket. He left it lay. She helped him up from his chair, and out from behind the table. She handed him his cane, and walked with him to the front door.

Holding the door open for him, she said, "Come back and see us, Sir!"

He turned with his whole body, winked a smile, and nodded a thank you. "You are very kind." he said softly.

When Mary went to clean his table, she almost fainted. Under his plate she found a business card, and a note scribbled on a napkin. Under the napkin was a one hundred dollar bill.

The note on the napkin read...

"Dear Mary, I respect you very much, and you respect yourself too. It shows by the way you treat others. You have found the secret of happiness. Your kind gestures will shine through those who meet you."

The man she had waited on was the owner of the restaurant where she worked. This was the first time that she, or any of his employees had ever seen him in person.

Note: This story is based on actual events experienced by a friend from St. Paul, Minnesota. The note is the exact wording on the napkin that she has kept in her scrap book for fifteen years.

The Mouse Trap

A mouse looked through the crack in the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package.

What food might this contain?" The mouse wondered - he was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap. Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning. There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!"

The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, "Mr. Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you, but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it."

The mouse turned to the pig and told him, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The pig sympathized, but said, "I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse, but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured you are in my prayers."

The mouse turned to the cow and said "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The cow said, "Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you, but it's no skin off my nose."

So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer's mousetrap alone.

That very night a sound was heard throughout the house -- like the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey. The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake bit the farmer's wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital, and she returned home with a fever.

Everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup's main ingredient.

But his wife's sickness continued, so friends and neighbors came to sit with her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig.

The farmer's wife did not get well; she died. So many people came for her funeral; the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them.

The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall with great sadness.

The next time you hear someone is facing a problem and think it doesn't concern you, remember -- when one of us is threatened, we are all at risk. We are all involved in this journey called life. We must keep an eye out for one another and make an extra effort to encourage and help one another.

Dreams

The first day of college our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that that lit up her entire being.

She said, "Hi, handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can I give you a hug?" I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she gave me a giant squeeze. "Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked. She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, have a couple of children, and then retire and travel." "No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age. "I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me.

After class we walked to the student union building and share a chocolate milkshake. We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living it up. At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech, she dropped her three by five cards on the floor. Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began: "We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. "You have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a dream. When you lose your dreams, you die. We have so many people walking around who are dean and don't even know it!" "There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight. Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up by always finding the opportunity in change." "Have no regrets. The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets." She concluded her speech by courageously singing The Rose. She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives. At the years end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago.

One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep. Over two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.

Love you Rose as always i ll..

There are many messages in this story: you are never too old to learn, always pursue your dreams, you are never too old to set your goals and accomplish your dreams, laugh and find humor in everyday, find opportunities in change, especially in today's world where change is moving at a fast pace, don't let change overwhelm you, let change help you find opportunities you may have never seen! have no regrets - her story is so true, so many people use words such as "if only", "I wish", "I can't", etc. Do you have a dream, a wish, then turn it into a goal today - break it down, take one step, then another and accomplish your dream.

Building Your House

An elderly carpenter was ready to retire. He told his employer-contractor of his plans to leave the house-building business to live a more leisurely life with his wife and enjoy his extended family. He would miss the paycheck each week, but he wanted to retire. They could get by.

The contractor was sorry to see his good worker go & asked if he could build just one more house as a personal favor. The carpenter said yes, but over time it was easy to see that his heart was not in his work. He resorted to shoddy workmanship and used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end a dedicated career.

When the carpenter finished his work, his employer came to inspect the house. Then he handed the front-door key to the carpenter and said, "This is your house... my gift to you."

The carpenter was shocked!

What a shame! If he had only known he was building his own house, he would have done it all so differently.

So it is with us. We build our lives, a day at a time, often putting less than our best into the building. Then, with a shock, we realize we have to live in the house we have built. If we could do it over, we would do it much differently.

But, you cannot go back. You are the carpenter, and every day you hammer a nail, place a board, or erect a wall. Someone once said, "Life is a do-it-yourself project." Your attitude, and the choices you make today, help build the "house" you will live in tomorrow. Therefore, Build wisely!

How i live my life..

How Are You Living Your Life?

We Are Not In Control Of Destiny

Any minute, any second we could lose someone we know. We are not in control of our life's destiny.

How we live our life, while we are here in this world, is what counts. How we share, help and touch someone else's life is what counts. It's not all about you, it's not all about me but it's about a continuous circle of giving.

I have always said that nothing lasts forever and I mean NOTHING. I go through my own life without having expectations.

I have always been the type of person who has appreciated the simple things in life ... my friends... my family... and when I wake up each day, I think about what I can do for someone today.

I may not have much but what I can give comes from the heart. I have two shoulders for you to lean on, two ears that will listen and two arms to wrap around you in times of comfort.

People may come and go in our lives, but they leave their footprints within each of us.

Memories are what we continue to make through a lifetime and they become a part of us. Those memories will always be there for us to reflect upon. In a period of time we are allowed to connect to others who make our day somehow a little brighter.

People come into our lives for a season and a reason and even if it is for a short period of time, they give our life meaning.

Determination..

You also have, deep inside, a "never-say-die attitude".

In 1883, a creative engineer named John Roebling was inspired by an idea to build a spectacular bridge connecting New York with the Long Island. However bridge building experts throughout the world thought that this was an impossible feat and told Roebling to forget the idea. It just could not be done. It was not practical. It had never been done before.

Roebling could not ignore the vision he had in his mind of this bridge. He thought about it all the time and he knew deep in his heart that it could be done. He just had to share the dream with someone else. After much discussion and persuasion he managed to convince his son Washington, an up and coming engineer, that the bridge in fact could be built.

Working together for the first time, the father and son developed concepts of how it could be accomplished and how the obstacles could be overcome. With great excitement and inspiration, and the headiness of a wild challenge before them, they hired their crew and began to build their dream bridge.

The project started well, but when it was only a few months underway a tragic accident on the site took the life of John Roebling. Washington was injured and left with a certain amount of brain damage, which resulted in him not being able to walk or talk or even move.

"We told them so."

"Crazy men and their crazy dreams."

"It`s foolish to chase wild visions."

Everyone had a negative comment to make and felt that the project should be scrapped since the Roeblings were the only ones who knew how the bridge could be built. In spite of his handicap, Washington was never discouraged and still had a burning desire to complete the bridge and his mind was still as sharp as ever.

He tried to inspire and pass on his enthusiasm to some of his friends, but they were too daunted by the task. As he lay on his bed in his hospital room, with the sunlight streaming through the windows, a gentle breeze blew the flimsy white curtains apart and he was able to see the sky and the tops of the trees outside for just a moment.

It seemed that there was a message for him not to give up. Suddenly an idea hit him. All he could do was move one finger and he decided to make the best use of it. By moving this, he slowly developed a code of communication with his wife.

He touched his wife's arm with that finger, indicating to her that he wanted her to call the engineers again. Then he used the same method of tapping her arm to tell the engineers what to do. It seemed foolish but the project was under way again.

For 13 years Washington tapped out his instructions with his finger on his wife's arm, until the bridge was finally completed. Today the spectacular Brooklyn Bridge stands in all its glory as a tribute to the triumph of one man's indomitable spirit and his determination not to be defeated by circumstances. It is also a tribute to the engineers and their team work, and to their faith in a man who was considered mad by half the world. It stands too as a tangible monument to the love and devotion of his wife who for 13 long years patiently decoded the messages of her husband and told the engineers what to do.

Perhaps this is one of the best examples of a never-say-die attitude that overcomes a terrible physical handicap and achieves an impossible goal

are-you-learning

http://www.facebook.com/notes/kalidash-acharee/are-you-learning/10150154843397980

karma-yoga-for-complete-happines

http://www.facebook.com/notes/kalidash-acharee/karma-yoga-for-complete-happiness/10150170660312980

it-begins-with-you

http://www.facebook.com/notes/kalidash-acharee/it-begins-with-you/10150187182327980

i-wanted-to-change-the-world

http://www.facebook.com/notes/kalidash-acharee/i-wanted-to-change-the-world/10150194372457980

I shall be glad

http://www.facebook.com/notes/kalidash-acharee/i-shall-be-glad-by-grace-noll-crowell/10150196847272980

Being Honest

http://www.facebook.com/k.kalidash

Alistair, a very caring and kindhearted guy, was a responsible son to his family. He always kept his word and moved with people in a very pleasant manner. He had kept his promise to his father by completing his Sister's wedding in style and his father heartily rewarded him with a Mobile Phone. Alistair was very happy to receive such a present from his dad and as the days passed, the phone had become a part of his life and was always handled with great care.

One fine day Alistair was sent on an official tour to one of his company's branch offices in North India, along with his colleague Mahesh. Together they took an Auto Rickshaw from the Railway Station to their Guest House. After entering the Guest House, Alistair thought of calling his mother to convey his safe arrival but when he put his hand into his pocket to retrieve his phone, he was shocked to find that it gone.

He quickly recollected the entire journey and told Mahesh and the others that he had the phone when he had stepped into the Auto. Maybe, while in the vehicle, the phone had slipped out from his pocket.

Immediately Alistair asked Mahesh's for his phone and made a call to his number. He could hear the ring and was happy for a moment, but soon it just stopped. He tried again to call it, then again and again but the result was the same - no answer. He felt that somebody was purposefully disconnecting it.

Everyone could tell that Alistair was very upset about losing the phone. People around him, including Mahesh, start blabbering about it. They started commenting, "Who in this world is so honest as to return a lost phone especially an Auto or Taxi driver? They always wait for some occasion like this to make a profit out of things".

Alistair was totally disappointed to hear this. He asked his colleagues not to blame the poor driver. It was because of his own indifference he had lost the phone and for this, the driver couldn't be blamed. After a few minutes, Alistair forgot about the incident and cheerfully started to inquire about everyone's life there in the Guest House.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door, followed by the ringing of the doorbell. Mahesh opened the door and was surprised to see the Auto driver. The man handed over the mobile phone to Mahesh and only said he had intentionally disconnected the call because he was already on his way back to return the phone.

Mahesh called out for Alistair and started shouting, "Alistair's mobile phone is not lost and it has come back to him in style". People in the Guest House suggested to Alistair that he give some small tip to the driver for returning the phone.

Alistair hesitated a bit about this idea. Then, out of compulsion, he took out      Rs. 100 from his pocket and gave it to the man, thanking him for returning the phone.

Seeing the money, the driver's face turned red hot and he angrily replied that he had not returned the phone in order to get this reward but had done it knowing that he was helping somebody get a lost item back. If he had been money minded, he would have retained the phone and made a profit of 1000s.

The driver finally said that the words "Thank You" were enough to show he was appreciated and had asked Alistair not to be so careless in he future. With these words, he left the room.

This event was more than enough for the people there to realize that, "Happiness lies in one's Honesty and not in their Possessions".

Thus Alistair's quality of being honest had shown the others that "An Honest Face remains smiling forever".

And The Award Goes To…

paribartans,blogspot.com The great lyricist and singer, Mr. Sahil Agnihotri, went onto the stage to receive his award from none other than Mr. Pravin Kumar himself, for The Most Promising Singer Of The Year. Thousands of clapping hands exploded in unison.

As he took the award in his trembling hands, his heart throbbed with excitement. Here he was, a small town graduate from Bhivpur, just a clerk with a pay of Rs.3000 until last year… flickers of anxious cameras, floods of glorious lights; all waiting to embrace him in their waiting arms.

He felt as though he was an onlooker and all this was but a dream, a beautiful dream. He approached the microphone, held his award closely with his hands, gazed at it proudly and began:

"Oh My God! Oh my God! I can hardly believe all this." A drop of tear glistened at the corner of his eye. "I take this opportunity to thank Cine Star, my director and the entire team and above all Mr. Pravin Kumar for having given me this opportunity."

Fans surrounded him as he left the hall, to catch a fleeing glimpse, to try and feel even his jacket, to try and get an autograph. Signing an autograph was so much more exciting than the old dusty muster. He savored every single moment as he basked in glory.

Tonight was the realization of his dream, a dream that lay hidden in some corner of his heart as he sang in his small village school, as he composed the jingles for his college competitions. Then what seemed to be ridiculous was so true today. Oh! It was so true today.

As he stepped into his new black Octavia, his eyes met a pair of light brown sullen eyes. He blinked and tried to look for them in the thousands of pairs of eyes that shoved around just to see him. He shook his head and got into the car. The driver drove away. "Let me not think of anything else", thought Sahil, "except success, success and success".

"But the eyes…"

Now let's go back in time...


It was chilly outside. The leaves of the trees swayed in a light breeze. "Hahahaha." The laughter, the innocent laughter that had drawn him closer to her.

Was it the first time he saw her that he fell in love? He could not recollect. But the more he saw of her, the more he seemed to fall in love with her. Her life was so simple, her needs so minimal. "I want a small house of my own, where Baba, you and I would stay."

Her father was a retired and blind schoolteacher who, ever since the death of her mother, had raised Kavita. There was something definitely magical about the relationship they shared. There was a bond of deep love and an intimate friendship, which at times, Sahil envied. After all, having at least one caring parent is better than having none at all.

Sahil had agreed that Baba should stay with them after their wedding. He liked Baba. He was a quiet, self-sufficient old man, with a very strong sense of self-respect. He loved Sahil immensely.

"In an age where children boycott their own parents, which Son-In-Law would agree to look after his blind, old Father-In-Law?" He would choke.

"But Baba, I am your son, am I not?" Sahil would slowly put his arms around the old man.

"Sahil," he would look at his wrist, "this is all I have of my possessions in the world. A golden watch that my school gave me at retirement. This one is for you when I die."

Kavita is just like him. He would silently observe her smiling proudly at both of them. However, Sahil's needs were never so small.

"I want to be a big man, with lots of money, a bungalow, a car."

Kavita would laugh it off. "If wishes were horses, beggars would ride them. For the kinds of qualifications we possess, we should be content even if we got a job. This world is so competitive."

"But I can sing and compose music so well, Kavi. All I need is someone to listen to me. To be able to write, compose and sing, it is indeed a mighty talent."

"Do not get me wrong, Sahil," she would hold his hand. "Of course, you are so talented. But we do not know anybody who can take you higher. Moreover, a world of glory, more often than not, stinks. I have read about it in the magazines. The kinds of prices people pay to reach there is so disgusting. Are we not happy in our small world, just the three of us? Then we will have a couple of children. Our family."

"Anyways", she would add, "there is no end to wanting things."

Her smile would take away all the burdens from his heart. They would hold each other's hands and walk their way back home.

Their engagement had been a very low key affair, just the three of them in the local temple with the blessings of the priest and God. However, they had decided that the wedding would be a much grander affair.

Budgeting and planning had begun since there was just one month to go. July 17th was the D-Day. There were cards to be printed, people to be invited, hall to be arranged, the caterer to be called for, the decorator, the clothes; and only the two of them.

They would accompany each other everywhere, fight over the color of the chairs, the Hall, the menu and after a lot of arguments, they would arrive at some consensus. You win this time and I take the next. Oh it was undoubtedly exciting.

"Sahil, it is already 3rd July and we haven't got our bridals."

After work they went together to purchase two sets of clothes. The suit that caught Sahil's attention cost Rs.35,000, and that was all they had for their clothes, jewelry and the decorator put together. He had to finally content himself with a black suit. "Not too good," he sighed.

As they went over to the counter to pay, he saw that the customer, who had purchased just before they had come in, had left behind his wallet and credit cars.

"Sir! Sir," ran Sahil after him.

At the entrance the man turned to his call.

Mr. Pravin Kumar.

Sahil was dumb struck. He actually was standing face to face with the great music director, Mr. Pravin Kumar.

"Yes?" he looked questioningly at Sahil. Sahil held out the wallet to him.

"Oh my God!" exclaimed Mr. Pravin Kumar. "Thank you so much. This has so much money in it. Besides all my cards are in it too. Thank you so much. Maybe you could use this". He extended a Rs.500 note to Sahil.

"No thank you sir." It was Kavita. " Sir, we may not be as rich as you are, but we are so endowed that we could do without pay for our small helps."

"Oh! I am sorry to offend you ma'am. Well, here is my card. I would be pleased to do anything that you may need."

Sahil brooded over what had happened.

"Sahil," Kavita shoved him to walk faster, "these big people have so many cards printed, and they will give it to each and everybody. They will not even recognize you again. In any case, what would be the value of money that you returned to him? He must be making three times more on every single song that he directs."

Sahil looked at her, without any reply.

Evenings passed without any word from Sahil. She realized that he went to Mr. Praveen Kumar's office.

"It is just a fad that will phase out," reassured her father.

She went on nonchalantly with the rest of the preparations. "I wish Sahil were here, Baba," she would say.

On the 12th of July, Sahil came running into the house.

"Kavi! Kavi!" The joy in his voice was so evident.

She came rushing out of the kitchen.

"What is it Sahil?" asked Baba.

"Baba, I have been chosen to sing for Mr. Pravin Kumar's forthcoming movie," he announced to a dumbstruck audience.

"Baba, he says that I will make it big in life. Oh, Kavi, you will be the wife of a great man now. We will have a bungalow, a car, everything that you dreamt of but thought you would never have. Oh, Kavi."

She could feel the excitement in his heart as he hugged her. Is this real?

Her heart thronged to see the dream come true for the man she loved the most in this world.

"Tonight, Mr. Pravin Kumar has invited us over for dinner at The Regal Plaza. Oh Kavi, do look your best. Please leave your hair open."

As she walked into the kitchen, he held her hand and said, "You look so seductive that way." She blushed and ran in.

Kavita was dressed in a simple starched cotton black saree with red border. Her black silky hair fell over her shoulder. Sahil's eyes twinkled. They left the house and he called for a taxi.

Once in the taxi, Sahil spoke," Oh Kavi, I know you understand that this will be the achievement of my life. It will make my life… no, our lives into a living magnificence; I shall be popular, people will seek me out. I shall be great. Mr. Sahil Agnihotri, you shall be great. But Kavi, there will be a small compromise that you will have to make in life. After all, to achieve this, I am sure you will help me out. Promise me, Kavi, promise me."

Kavi looked puzzled. "How can I help you? If I were that good, I would have been a singer myself. What do you want me to do?"

"Just understand me Kavi, just understand me. I am doing this for us, for Baba, for our children. You must stand by me at all times. You must understand and love me just as always."

Kavita winced. Then she smiled as she saw his anxious face. "Of course I will stand by you, silly. Who else do I have?"

They stepped out of the taxi and entered the magnificent hotel. Kavita was bedazzled. She had never seen anything like this except in the movies. She clutched Sahil's arm fondly.

"Oh! She has the dignity of the rich," thought Sahil. "Her air, her walk."

He looked at her so fondly. She blushed.

They went up the elevator. Room no. 3234. The door opened to Pravin Kumar, who was seated on the couch with a bottle of liquor in front of him. She did not like him. Her eyes said that. However, for the sake of Sahil, she smiled at him.

"Your fiancé is a big man now. Here is his token money of Rs.250000."

She smiled and looked at Sahil. At Sahil's request, she took the check from him.

"Here is the contract," said Mr. Pravin Kumar. "Sahil is indeed lucky. He has a beautiful lady like you to love him."

His hands rested on her thighs. She slowly pulled her legs away and looked at Sahil. He did not seem to mind. Something hit her.

After another 10 minutes, Sahil rose. "I shall be back in a few minutes. I have to get the contract xeroxed. Kavi, just give Mr. Pravin Kumar some company and I shall just be back."

Kavita began to protest, but Sahil was gone. Her scared eyes looked around the room, but could hardly capture anything. He slowly moved close to her. She slowly moved, but he put his arms around her. She stood up.

"How dare you? My fiancé will murder you if he finds out."

"Hahahaha!" roared Pravin Kumar. "Do you think Sahil has to go out of the room to Xerox the contract, when we have such wonderful room service?"

She felt her eyes black out.

She woke up to see Sahil holding her.

"Listen Kavita, I will become a big singer and we will all stay happily together. These things are so common in the west. Besides, nobody will know."

As the car pulled up to Kavita's house, she slowly slid off her engagement ring, silently thrust it in his palms and walked into her house. He did not have the courage to enter.

Fast forward to the present time…


His new black Octavia halted with a jerk. Sahil looked around. It was his bungalow. The watchman came running up to him.

"Sahib, there is a lady out to meet you. She calls herself Kavita."

Kavita? His heart missed a beat.

He ran towards her. She was just the same; the same posture in a simple cotton salwar kameez. He ran to her.

"Oh Kavita, if I had asked God for anything else today, he would have probably granted me even that."

He reached out to embrace her. She stepped backward. She put her hands into her handbag and brought out something. In the dim streetlight, the object glistened. It was a wristwatch. It was Baba's watch. He reached out to take it.

"Baba?" He asked.

She nodded, turned and walked off.

"Kavi!!!" He called out.

His voice lay muffled in the sound of the wind.

SSSHHHHH, whispered the leaves.

What Would You Sacrifice For Success?

A Little Bit Every Day

Recently I had a conversation with a person who has a long-term goal that will take a few years to achieve. The individual seemed overwhelmed with the size of the goal and was getting discouraged. Their focus was on all the things they need to do to reach the goal and their comment to me was, "I just can't do it". It reminded me of the story of the clock that had been running and running:

This clock had sat on the mantle for years. And it ran and ran. One day, the clock began to think about how many times it had to tick during the year. It counted up the seconds - it would have to tick 31,536,000 times a year. The clock seemed overwhelmed - "I can't do it, that is just too much." So the clock stopped ticking. Then somebody reminded the clock that it didn't have to tick the 31,536,000 seconds all at one time, but rather one tick at a time. The clock then realized this was okay and started ticking again!

When we set our goals, it is good to visualize the end results. But, getting to our goal is doing a little bit every day; not doing it all at once. So the next time you find yourself overwhelmed by your goal, remember the clock and the number of ticks - do a little bit every day and over time you will reach your goal. 

No One Is Dealt A Perfect Hand

Allow me to illustrate a situation that proves that the best results can rise from the worst of circumstances.

A young man was playing poker with six of his friends. Now this young man did not have a vast amount of money but wanted to play anyway so he threw a quarter of his money in the pot.

When the dealer dealt his cards he noticed he had the worst possible hand - a high card. Since he had put a quarter of his money in the pot already, he reasoned that he would do what he could to come out victorious.

This young man knew what he was doing and did not even glance at any of the other six players. When the opportunity arose to swap all of his cards he tactfully refused and kept his seemingly worthless hand.

Now, when the time came to throw in more bets, this young man put in another quarter of his earnings. Because three of the other six observed that he never changed his cards, they assumed he had a great hand so they immediately folded and withdrew whilst the remaining three called and threw in some of their money.

Knowing that there were still three players left, he decided to put all his money in the pot. This frightened the last three and they folded. This young man came out victorious and now had ten times the amount he began with.

When his six friends asked him to show them his hand, he threw his cards on the table revealing the lowest hand. After a brief pause the young man stated:

"I knew I was going to win because the cards don't matter in poker, it is the trick of leading your opponent to believe you have an unbeatable hand".

This is not to say we should bluff our way through life, rather we should use what we have to be the best we can.

In life, no one is dealt with a perfect hand. Some are just dealt with higher cards and some will choose to try and change those cards.

If you want to win in anything, remember that your hand is only as strong as your will and determination. Put in all you talents and never focus on what another person has because you will just be more disappointed in the end.

Your life is in YOUR hand.

Karma Yoga and Management

Karma Yoga and Management

During the last ten years of my working life, I have adopted the path of Karma Yoga in performing the daily duties of a senior manager. Karma Yoga is an effective tool for managers to motivate and lead people by their own example, to create a balanced working environment to foster creativity and to initiate unorthodox solutions to problems.
Karma is the law of cause and effect, action and reaction. Karma Yoga is action performed with detachment, with meditative awareness. The Bhagavad Gita states that 'action alone concerns, never its fruits; stability in success and failure, this balance is called Yoga.' (Chapter 2, 47-48). In the New Testament, the Gospels relate the life, work, love and message of Lord Jesus Christ, an exemplary karma yogi : 'As you sow, so shall you harvest' (karma). 'Pray and work' (karma yoga).
Mahatma Gandhi, the great karma yogi of the twentieth century, was a motivator, a leader, a 'general manager' of the independence campaign in India. In The Story of My Experiments with Truth, he understated his mission in these words :'I have nothing new to teach the world. Truth and non-violence are as old as the hills.' Gandhi's life was a straight line of work and prayer. When he was assassinated he went into maha samadhi with God's words on his lips, Ram, Ram.
What is karma ? According to Paramahamsa Niranjanananda: 'There is a very clear concept that karma arises due to the attractions and desires in life. Experiences that may have happened thirty years ago are remembered by us due to this karmic link. The event which gave birth to a karma took place a long time back, but the influence of that event has carried on. Therefore, the experience of that karma continues for an extended period until it reduces its intensity.' In philosophical terms, karma means the primal seed of desire which guides the destiny, thought, actions and behaviour of every individual. Karma, by the nature of action, is physical or mental and originates on different planes of our being, including inherent primal seeds as well as samskaras. Through yogic practices, karma can be reduced in intensity or positively transformed to achieve a balanced mind and personality.
What is Karma Yoga? In his book Yoga Darshan, Paramahamsa Niranjanananda states that it can be classified as the true psychological aspect of Yoga because in the process of dynamic meditation we have to become aware of the subtle areas of our personality, which involves the awakening of latent mental faculties and new dimensions of awareness. Actions must be performed consciously and one's attitude towards the actions observed. We actions on the levels of speech, minds intellect, samskara and experiential realisation.
In Karma Yoga it is not the actions themselves which are considered to be important, but the frame of mind in which they are performed. Paramahamsa Niranjanananda lists the attributes of Karma Yoga as efficiency, equanimity, absence of expectation, egoless-ness, renunciation of limited desires, positive thinking, and duty or dharma. These attributes fit nicely into the profile of a good manager.
What are the duties of a manager? A general manager has full responsibility for his operational unit. He sets targets within the framework of a long term strategic plan. He makes use of manpower and assets in the most economical way to achieve or exceed expected results. Assets are static in nature. To generate profit or growth with assets, a transformation is necessary, a process which requires imagination and creativity. Productivity and motivation of the labour force go hand in hand, and the best motivator is the example of a motivated boss.
A manager is also responsible for planning the future direction and goals of the long term enterprise, a process which requires intuition, imagination, courage and common sense. Ideally, a skilled manager will have qualities of efficiency, perceptivity, creativity, good human relations, intelligence and a healthy mind and body, as well as endurance, dedication, discipline and balance in success and failure. First and fore most will be service: love for his work and love for his people.
This super-person does not exist. We are all human beings with deficiencies which is exactly where yogic practices can help us to improve. A balanced mind will mean improvement in speaking, listening, commanding attention, understanding, retaining i information, formulating ideas, doing the right thing at the right time in the right place, communicating and problem solving. Therefore, Karma Yoga is the ideal time-saving practice for the manager in his workplace.
One cannot become a karma yogi overnight. It is a long term process of self-discipline, maturing and expanding the awareness. I was over fifty years of age when I made a personal commitment to take up the path of Karma Yoga. I began by becoming consciously aware of my positive and negative qualities. Initially it took some courage in the office to change patterns, for example, to counter aggression with non-violence. But the results were positive and as respect from subordinates, superiors and customers began to rise slowly but steadily, some people began to copy me. This defusing of tension resulted in a more balanced and relaxed office atmosphere and better team work, and I began to introduce another positive experience. The key to success is detachment, regularity, discipline and endurance. Karma Yoga is not without setbacks but a balanced mind makes it easier to handle frustrations.
In any organisation, meetings are necessary to inform, motivate, coordinate, plan, budget, etc., and follow-up; they are also an excellent tool for the manager to influence and motivate people, as well as tapping their ideas and creativity. However, in many large corporate structures, meetings are often too frequent, too long and badly prepared. The manager's personal problems may also constitute a 'hidden' agenda. In my experience, careful preparation of meetings with a proper agenda increases interest, reduces meeting time substantially and improves efficiency.
One 'noble' duty of a manager is to give orders to subordinates. In strong, hierarchical organisations, orders are given by power of authority, for example, by posting a notice on a notice board, a procedure which creates a distance between the manager and subordinates. In my experience, giving orders is akin to a moving meditation. It involves the delegation of authority, motivating and ensuring that the job is understood and within the capabilities of the subordinate. To give a proper order is a process of thinking, communication and teamwork. The caring manager will also follow-up and will not criticise.
Sooner or later, a manager's heart will request him to disobey the orders, rules and regulations of his superior, for example, when human rights would be violated or life endangered. This requires courage and the ability to face the consequences which are virtues of a mature karma yogi. Gandhi was, of course, the master of disobedience.
In conclusion, while performing the daily duties of a senior manager I have experienced fruitful developments by practising Karma Yoga. The key to success is regular practice, discipline and endurance. Make work fun - collaborators will appreciate a happy and charismatic boss. Sankalpa and diksha will definitely support the process. Conviction arid good cars to listen to the 'Guru in the heart' are important as well.
In a much broader sense, Swami Sivananda's message was that Yoga is the path for developing a healthier and better human society. Swami Satyananda took up the task to spread Yoga from shore to shore. Managers of all ranks are key people in worldly society, and to convince them to take up the path of Karma Yoga in the workplace would speed up the process of Sivananda's vision significantly. But how to spread the mission?
One idea is to provide the essence of Karma Yoga and other yogic practices in the form of training packages, for example, 'Imagination and Creativity Training', (ICT project) or 'Gemtrak, a General Management Training Kit', in the same way as management consultants market their own products. Since I have had beneficial experiences practising Karma Yoga in the workplace as a manager, I think it would be worthwhile in the future giving thought to the presentation of yogic practices in an adapted form applicable in management education, for example, under the slogan:
'Yoga from shore to shore, Yoga from door to door.'